Are you dating this guy?

A Momma’s boy typically describes a guy who always puts his mother first, before anything or anyone else. Although there is nothing wrong with considering your mother a priority in certain aspects of life, if it’s so extreme that everything depends on her, it’s likely to cause issues in romantic relationships. A Momma’s boy may need to discuss everything with his mother before making any decisions on his own. He seeks not only her approval, but he tends to lean on to his mother for almost everything, oblivious to those decisions couples should be making together. It’s doubtful a Momma’s boy has actually ascended to adulthood, as they have spent their entire life being pampered by their mother, with most decisions having been made for them. There’s a reason why the term isn’t ‘Momma’s Man’. If you are dealing with this type of a guy, you may find some good advice below.

How to Deal with a Momma’s Boy

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    Accept that his mother will always be number one in his life.

    She was there long before you, and you need to be clear you are not looking to take her place. If you’re trying to separate him from his mom, you’ll never win. The goal is NOT to live harmoniously as a couple by completely cutting his mother out of your relationship. That would be selfish and hurtful. The idea is to find see this situation in a positive life, and try to live within the emotional boundaries already established. Remember to be fair and try to see it from his side.

     
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    Communicate with him about his actions.

    In some cases, he may not even realize he’s being a Momma’s boy. Tell him when you have concerns based on his comments or behavior, regarding his mother. Be honest about how you feel, but don’t insult him for having a close relationship with his mom. Avoid using the term “Momma’s boy”, as that will only make the situation worse.

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    Discuss the expectations you have of each other.

    Ask him what he wants from you in a relationship. Let him know that you are not going to treat him exactly like his mother does because you are not his mother.. He obviously views his mother as an ideal woman, and, because you are not his mother, he may compare you to his mother. You should let him know this is unacceptable. You are his lover, not his mother, and you’ve no desire to take on a motherly role in your relationship.

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    Don’t threaten him.

    If you do, he will begin to resentment you because he will see it as you’re asking him to choose between you and his mother. Remember, you are not trying to eliminate his mother from your life, just resolve an issue, and alter his behavior. Your objective is for him to be capable of making decisions on his own and not depend on his mother too much.

  5. 5
    Give him enough time to change.

    Do not expect that after one conversation, you will immediately see a huge turnaround in the situation. As long as he is trying, be patient. Most likely, the more he feels that you are serious about the relationship, the more that he will become willing to resolve the issue.

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    Get to know his mother.

    If you make an effort to befriend her and show that you are not trying to break the bond between her and her son, she will be more likely to support your relationship. Additionally, it will mean a lot to him because he’ll see that you’re trying to understand his relationship with his mom, rather than eliminate her from your life. Also, this will allow him to see the distinction between his relationship with his mother and you. It’s much better for you to be friends with his mom, rather than view her as an obstacle in your relationship.

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    Take trips together.

    This will allow him to experience and enjoy life with just the two of you. Let him appreciate how nice it is to have a little bit of privacy in which all that matters is the two of you, and all that he needs to focus on, is you. It must be exhausting to be a Momma’s boy.

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    Talk to his mother about your relationship.

    Be honest about how you feel, and explain some of your expectations for the relationship. If you are able to communicate this to his mother, she will understand your perspective, and realize that you only want what’s best for her son, and your relationship. What is most important to this woman is her son’s happiness. Make sure she knows you can make her son happy.

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    Reflect carefully on your relationship, and make strong decisions when necessary.

    Consider the status of your relationship, and decide if the current situation is hopeless, despite several conversations or if it’s something you think can be resolved. If not, it may be something you need to walk away from. In any relationship, it is very important for both parties to know where their priorities lie, and that those priorities are similar. He can only change when he’s ready to, and you can’t spend your life wanting something from a relationship that you will never receive. If neither of you is willing to change your expectations or behavior, it may be time to consider moving on.

How to Improve the Situation when Dealing with a Momma’s Boy

Changing a Momma’s boy might be downright impossible. It puts you him in between you and his mother, which is a very uncomfortable situation to be in. His love and respect for his mother is an admirable thing, but your relationship will pay the price for that devotion if he can’t create a balance between the two of you. With a little effort and a lot of patience, you may be able to find a happy medium in your relationship. It’s important to address these issues as a couple, and come up with a solution that will make all three of you happy. Check out the tips below for some ways to improve your relationship with a Momma’s boy.

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    Write him a letter.

    Perhaps you don’t have the courage to tell him face-to-face exactly how you feel so take to pen and paper to express your honest thoughts and feelings about what’s going on in your relationship. Tell him how the attention he know when he does things that upset you, so writing them down might help him realize his over-devotion to his mother is causing problems in his relationship. Anticipate different scenarios of how he might react, so you already have a plan to tackle it. Above all, give him enough time to reflect upon the things you have revealed, as it all might be news to him.

  2. 2
    Propose some time away from each other to reflect on the issue.

    Do not do this as a threat, but to give both of you some time to assess your relationship.

  3. 3
    Learn to cook his favorite dish.

    One of the main reasons men attach themselves so firmly to their mothers, is that their moms prepare their favorite dishes all the time. Ask his mother for her recipes, or better yet, offer to cook them with her so you can learn. This may also help improve your relationship with his mom, which can only be a good thing for you and your boyfriend.

  4. 4
    Settle into a place where you can have your privacy as a couple.

    It’s important in any relationship that you create an opportunity for the two of you to actually build your own family, on your own. This initiates independence, and it may motivate your partner to finally take full accountability for himself and his family.

Questions and Answers

What to avoid when dealing with mommas boy?

Sons who love their moms are certainly admirable, however, too much dependency on anyone is an unhealthy situation, even mother and son relationships. Momma’s boys tend to be very obedient to their moms to the point that they lose their backbone and sense of self. These, and not being able to decide on their own and letting mom take over most things in their lives are a few disadvantages of being a momma’s boy.

When dealing with a Momma’s boy, you should avoid criticizing his mom or even contesting certain decisions that his mom made for him. These types of men have been spoiled and pampered by their moms, even after they’ve already grown up. Their moms tend to take control of their son’s affairs – even when it comes to their career and personal lives. Some moms think that they are doing the right thing for their sons, but in fact, they restrict their son’s growth in all aspects, making him unable to stand on his own. Momma’s boys tend to be overindulgent, dependent, and irresponsible. Pointing this out to a Momma’s boy, or worse, his mother, would be futile and end in an emotionally war.

Instead, it would help to encourage him to make his own decisions. Baby steps, friend – baby steps. If he begins to accomplishment things on his own and to gain some independence, this will build up his confidence to move on to bigger life-changing decisions on his own life. Eventually, with constant motivation and encouragement, he will learn to be independent and responsible for his own choices and be able to regain control of his life. The goal is not to eliminate his mom’s influence on him but to let him realize that he is fully capable of making the right decisions with support from his mom and other mentors. Age is certainly a factor. The older he is, the more entrenched he will be in this relationship of dependency.

Do not make it your goal to eliminate his mother from his life. You will probably only succeed at eliminating him from your life. Be very careful not to emulate the relationship he has with his mother. You do not want to be a man’s Mommy. Know when you are defeated, and he will never be the man you’d hoped, and walk away.

  •  Hope after this article you’ll have better tactics to deal with such a situation or even know how to advice a friend in such a relationship..courtesy of VISI HOW
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WHAT TO WEAR FOR AN INTERVIEW

The colors you wear in a professional setting are about so much more than mere fashion or style. You might want to think twice before you fall back on basic black every day. You may believe it looks classic and sophisticated, or maybe you’re wearing it because it’s just plain easy. But black could also be signaling to your co-worker other messages that you might or would like to find out…It’s not only black rather am going to share and talk about which color is appropriate for which occasion or event for different colors send subconscious messages, and can affect your mood, as well as the mood of the workers around you.
Here’s a quick rundown of what other colors can say about you at work:

BLACK:
blackshirtBlack is the color of authority and power which is why many business men and police officers are seen wearing black. It is popular in fashion because it makes people appear thinner. It is also stylish and timeless. Black also implies submission. Priests wear black to signify submission to God. Some fashion experts say a woman wearing black implies submission to men. Black outfits can also be overpowering. Apart from the above mentioned, it can also indicate that you are depressed, unimaginative, dark-spirited and lazy.

WHITE:
whiteshirt fineBrides wear white to symbolize innocence and purity. White reflects light and is considered a summer color. White is popular in decorating and in fashion because it is light, neutral, and goes with everything. However, white shows dirt and is therefore more difficult to keep clean than other colors. Doctors and nurses wear white to imply sterility. All white is best for painter, chef and nurse.
GREEN:
greenshirt fineCurrently the most popular decorating color, green symbolizes nature. It is the easiest color on the eye and can improve vision. It is a calming, refreshing color. People waiting to appear on TV sit in “green rooms” to relax. Hospitals often use green because it relaxes patients. Brides in the middle Ages wore green to symbolize fertility. Dark green is masculine, conservative, and implies wealth. Darker greens can connote power, class, strength and conservatism. Brighter greens tell people you’re sporty, more casual and often cheerful.

PINK:
pinkshirt finePink is not just for women anymore. Men who wear pale pink or salmon accents tell the world they’re confident, daring and independent enough to sport what has previously been considered a feminine color. Women can use it to soften a strong, dark-colored suit and look more approachable. When one does bright pink from head to toe is just plain annoying and hurts people’s eyes. Pink is also the most romantic color. its more tranquilizing. Sports teams sometimes paint the locker rooms used by opposing teams bright pink so their opponents will lose energy.

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RED:
redshirt fineNow if you really want to blow away your colleagues, superiors or potential employers, throw in a splash of red. Red is powerful and strong. It shows you’re not afraid to stand out, and it gets attention. It’s also the most emotionally intense color; red stimulates a faster heartbeat and breathing. It is also the color of love. Red clothing gets noticed and makes the wearer appear heavier. Since it is an extreme color, red clothing might not help people in negotiations or confrontations. Red cars are popular targets for thieves. In decorating, red is usually used as an accent. Decorators say that red furniture should be perfect since it will attract attention.
BLUE:
blueshirt-fineThe color of the sky and the ocean, blue is one of the most popular colors. It causes the opposite reaction as red. Peaceful, tranquil blue causes the body to produce calming chemicals, so it is often used in bedrooms. Blue can also be cold and depressing. Fashion consultants recommend wearing navy blue to job interviews because it symbolizes loyalty and inspires confidence. People are more productive in blue rooms. Studies show weightlifters are able to handle heavier weights in blue gyms.
YELLOW:
yellowWhile it is considered an optimistic color, people lose their tempers more often in yellow rooms, and babies will cry more. It is the most difficult color for the eye to take in, so it can be overpowering if overused. Yellow enhances concentration, hence its use for legal pads. It also speeds metabolism. Yellow tells people you’re casual, playful, cheerful, approachable and not afraid to take risks. Seeing yellow can cheer people up, so you’re perceived as having a sunny personality just for wearing it.

BROWN:
grey brownBrown is the color of earth and is abundant in nature. Light brown implies genuineness while dark brown is similar to wood or leather. Brown can also be sad and wistful. Men are more apt to say brown is one of their favorite colors. It is typically worn by those who also wear a lot of green: the people involved in the environment and partaking in the go-green movement because it symbolized soil. Brown is also worn by those who are grounded and down to earth.
PURPLE:
purpleshirt- fineDark purple says elegance, authority, sophistication, class and a regal demeanor. It’s also considered feminine and romantic too. Men can get away with a deep burgundy jacket to give a refined yet highly stylish impression. Women can appear strong, powerful and confident in a deep purple jacket, suit or blouse. A deep purple dressy T-shirt or button down in a very casual work environment says “I’m confident and efficient, yet not stuffy.”
Not everyone fits these molds, but these will give you the general idea of what others are thinking when they see you. If you don’t like what you see and are looking to change it, analyze the different colors and think about what they mean to you and what you’re looking for others to perceive about you. Do you want to appear fresher? Try white. Do you want to express yourself? Try more purples and reds. This is not the most extensive list and everyone has different opinions, so do what is most important and wear what makes you feel comfortable. Your personality is what is most important, after all.

This entry was posted on August 4, 2015. 2 Comments

CAN’T FIND CLOTHS THAT FIT??

I know most of us assume that one has to have a good body shape for one to look best in every outfit one fits on, but I come to you with an eye opener that there are ways to make sure your body is looking finest no matter what your weight, height and shape..HOW? Is the question on everyone’s mind; the answer is simple, you shouldn’t purchase clothes because of the designer or the cost, rather before you buy that piece of cloth, ask yourself ,is it meant for my body type?? You also need to know what category you fall into so that you buy clothes that complement your physique…below are some of the body types, read on to understand where u fall.

THE BELL
The bell types are those who are somewhat small up tops, which get larger through the stomach, hips and waist. Most women fall into this body type and as most women age, they go towards this type. Well, if you are of this body type, the best  thing you can do to look your best is to try to balance out the top and lower half of your body. You want to add height or depth near your shoulders, which can be done by adding shoulder pads or choosing tops that feature boxy styles. This will make your waist seem more equal to your shoulders, meaning your waist will look thinner. Also, try wrap around shirts, shirts with different angles, or tunics to help hide your midsection.

bellshape
THE LOLLIPOP
These Lollipop ladies are typically big in the bust, and smaller tapering down towards the floor, meaning thin stomachs, hips and legs. The Strapless looks are great for these girls, or anything fitted that hugs your stomach to show off your slender figure. If you’re uncomfortable with thin legs, there are many floor length dresses that can accentuate your bust line without compromising your legs. For pants, try a boot cut version that will help to balance your bottom half with your bust line.
THE COLUMN
The column is just what it sounds like, these types are those who are tiny from top to bottom, and while most clothes probably look their best on this body type, there are those that look odd on them. They are assumed to be the Lucky ladies! Most of our seriously tall female friends find themselves falling into the Column body type. Unless you are embarrassed about your height, you can try just about every style of clothing, because they are made for you! If you prefer to downplay your height, try styles that are belted or something that breaks up the long look that may become tiresome to you.
THE CELLO
Are you big on top and on the bottom? You may fall into the Cello category. While you may not be an overweight woman, many Cello women are very tiny in their waists but have larger busts and behinds.
While many women would kill for this figure, it can also be difficult to downplay those dangerous curves. Try to wear V neck shirts that can downplay your bust, and avoid clothing that is too form fitting that might seem like it is clinging to those areas that you want to cover up. You might want to consider trying out a heavier style of shoe since this can also pull the eye down to your thin ankles and feet. Full skirts can also be a Cello girl’s best friend.
CORNET STYLE
Are you built like a fashion model or as a 12 years boy as some of your jealous friends might refer to u as? Well no fear, you are the Cornet style. While most of your pals are probably jealous of your slender figure, tight tummy, and ability to look pretty good in just about anything, it can get odd having no boobs or curves to accentuate.
The Cornet body often has broad, thin shoulders, little to no bust, a tiny waist and hips, along with stick thin legs. Really tall women can fall into this type if they are not busty. Try to find looks that accentuate the breasts and hips that you do have- low slung pants, V neck tops paired with a push up bra can help.

THE GOBLET
The Goblet ladies, on the other hand, are overflowing with these extra assets! Our Goblet girls often have wide shoulders but are quite tiny on the bottom half, with thin legs.
You will want to accentuate those long slender legs in every way possible, so skirts work well, or pants with a high waist. V neck shirts can help downplay the bust, which let the eye rest on your long and slender legs.
THE SKITTLE
The Skittle body type pairs a tiny top with a curvy bottom. While most women who fall into this category curse it, you can look sexy in many of the great looks available to you.
You want to put focus on your breasts, so choose deep V neck looks paired with a bra that adds a lot of cleavage. You can also pull off strapless looks that are low enough to show a little cleavage, which immediately makes breasts look larger. Wear jackets and structured shirts with shoulder pads, collars, lapels, or a boxy feel to make your top half look balanced with your bottom half. This will act like a mirage to make your hips and butt look tinier. Patterned pieces can also hide the large thighs or hips you’re trying to hide
THE VASE
Lastly, is the Vase. This is a more modern form of the old hourglass figure that we all were taught as children that we should strive to attain. If you have a long torso, breasts that balance out with your hips and thighs, you’re in luck, you’re a vase!
This is the figure most men point to as sexy. Well if you are this type u ought to wear fitted clothing because it will fall on you well. Low or scovaseoped necklines will accentuate your bust, but not toomuch. Jackets will work as a great cover up for you if you choose a fitted dress or shirt but need to cover up a bit. Almost all styles and looks that you choose are going to look good on you! So feel free to experiment.
Hopefully after going through this you are able to determine your body type and I can assure you that looking great and being in shape is a start, but dressing for your style is the icing on the cake and will ensure you look even more fabulous, so make sure to implement these tips today to look your best. Courtesy of ideal bite.

This entry was posted on July 31, 2015. 2 Comments